More Than You Know
by SydneyJanelle
Summary: Bella was raped and ends up pregnant .When she meets Alice's cousin Edward sparks fly but she thinks she no good and used. Edward on the other hand thinks she beautiful but feels like she is hiding something.What is Bella gonna do when her rapist comes
1. Preface

**PREFACE**

Grr…if the dude that did this to me was here I would kill him or maybe run yeah probably run. "Breath Bella" My best friend Alice said nervously. "What do you think I'm doing!" I yell. I feel bad for yelling but hey I'm going into labor, I'm suppose to yell. Right? Oh, well. "I'm sorry Alice, it just hurts so bad. I'm just really scared." I say quietly. "Its ok and I know babe. You have a right to be scared." She said trying to soothe me. "No I don't! I have to be strong for this baby. I don't know if I can do this Ali. Did I do the right choice and not give my baby up for adoption? Am I gonna be a bad mom?" I tell her my fears for the first time as the tears started. "Everything's gonna be fine Izzy B. Your gonna be a great momma and you did the right choice to keep you baby." She tells me sternly and I believe her. I am gonna be a good mother and do what I can for my baby. "Thank you Ali." I tell her sincerely. Everyone is in the waiting room waiting till they hear what is going on. So I tell Ali to go tell them what is going on. Another contraction hit and boy was it painful. Your most likely wondering why I'm seventeen, pregnant, all alone (boy wise), and what the hell is going on. Well truth be told I was raped I little over nine months ago. Some of you might ask why I keep the kid or didn't have an abortion. That is a simple answer really. I don't believe in abortion and I was gonna put my baby up for adoption but when I first seen my baby's feet and arms I fell in love and that is why I am having my baby. So here is my story, it started when I was walking home from work.

Yes I know short chapter but it is the preface. Sorry if this disappointed anyone. Review and tell me what you think please. If your confused about something ask me and ill try to explain the best I can. Also if you have any advice please tell me. Please and Thank you. Review!!!


	2. Regular Day

**Chapter 2: Regular Day**

"**Screw Emmet, because of him I have to walk home now!" I yell to my manager as  
****I'm getting ready to leave. He laughs and says goodnight. I love Mr. Kevin.**

******"****Hey, Bella. You want me to give a ride home. I know how you can return the favor." Mike Newton said winking.**

**I shake my head at him, yell pig, and slam the restraint door. My brown-red shoulder length hair was pulled back in to  
********a high ponytail and my bangs pulled out of my face with a clip. I wait to my chocolate brown eyes adjust to the night and start walking.**

**I guess I know why Mike want to get in my pants. He cant get into Alice's, Rose's, Alexa's, Jojo's, Shannon's, and Kayla's because they  
********all have boyfriends unlike me. I know I'm pretty but I don't think I'm gorgeous like the girls say I am. Whatever. There gorgeous.**

**Anyway Mike can not take a hint. I mean sure he is all right looking but he's so disgusting. Only one person lets him hit,  
********and that's Jessica but she a slut so she really doesn't count.**

**I'm glad its Friday maybe the girls want to go out. I just hope they can get away from the boys. It seams I'm all alone since I broke  
********up with Luke. All he wanted to do was get in my pants anyway.**

**My mind is completely wiped from what I was thinking when Tonight my FM Static blared out of my black ipod. It reminds me of my mom.**

_**Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up  
**__**I need your loving hands to come and pick me up  
**__**And every night I miss youI can just look up  
and know the stars are  
holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight.**_

**It's been four years a week ago that my mamma died. But it seemed just like yesterday. I remember what I wore, how she looked, what the room **

**looked like, how the smells were, but most importantly I remember what she last said to me. I remember everything about that day even the funeral a week later. **

**Flashback**

_**13 years old**__**.**_

_**My friends come up to me trying to talk to me, I just stare strait at the coffin not speaking. I haven't talked to them in two weeks. I think I should feel bad but I don't have it in me.  
**__**My momma was beautiful. Her hair was brown with red mixed into it and came down to her butt. She had chocolate brown eyes that had great depth.  
**__**The thing you first notice about her when she smiles is her huge dimples. She was born in Italy and moved her seventeen years ago.**_

"_**Amore Mio. La mia stella brillante. Cosa darei per restarti accanto." my momma said in her thick Italian ascent.  
**__**(Translation in English = My love. My shining star. What would I give to stay here beside you.)**_

"_**You are my moon and stars Bella. Do you know why?" she said. **__**I just shook my head in response with tears streaming down my face.**_

"_**I though not. You kept me up all night when you were a baby and slept all day. You still do that. I tell your papa that your part vampire."  
**__**she stops to regain her strength. I think she has fallen asleep. As I'm about to get up she grips my hand and starts again.**_

"_**My beautiful Isabella, you have to be strong. Not only for you but for papa and Emmy. Your probably wondering why not tell this to them. Its because you will  
**__**keep this family together. When they don't cry tell them its ok to cry and when papa meets a nice woman that he likes but feels like he  
**__**shouldn't date other women because of me tell him momma said she would want you to.**_

"_**See that box over there?" she said while pointing to a brown wooden box that had ballerinas dancing on it. "Those are letters to help you with life.  
**__**When I'm not there to. Things in life are going to be hard but you will get through them. I love you so much Izzy-B. Now go get Emmet." with that I walked out to get Emmet.  
**__**At 11:12 that night she died in her sleep. My mom was 35 when she died of breast cancer.**_

**End flashback**

**I didn't know I was crying till I was sobbing in the middle of the street. I finally got my self together and started walking home.  
****I was lost in thoughts when I heard a car pull up. A guy rolled down the window a little bit.**

"**Need a ride home?" he asked. I shook my head, freaked out. I started to walk again when I heard him get out. ****Now I was terrified. "Come on sugar don't be like that."**

**He than grabbed me and pulled me into the ally. I started screaming. "You scream again, ****I'll kill you understand!" I nodded my head.  
"****Good girl." he said as he petted my hair.**

**He put a blindfold on my eyes than one on my mouth and tied my hands together. He started undressing me. I was crying plying with him to stop, but he didn't.  
****He roughly pulled down my pants and underwear. I heard him take off my belt and than he penetrated me, taking my virginity.  
****While he raped me he called me a whore and said he was glad he took my virginity. I tried to scream and push him away but he was to strong. Finally he finished.**

"**Get up and dressed and than leave or I will do it again." He said evilly.  
****He didn't have to tell me twice. I than ran home. "See you later sweetheart." he called as he passed me. Thank god he didn't stop.**

"**Daddy!" I yelled scared when I ran into my house.**

"**What Izzy-B! He yelled back playfully. When he came into the room he looked confused, than scared, finally angry. "Sue, come here.  
"****Sue my step-mother walked in. She looked terrified. She tried to get me to tell her what happened. I tried to tell her but I was crying to hard.  
****She was trying to help me calm down while daddy was on the phone calling the police and the hospital.**

**The door busted open and all my friend and family walked in. They were laughing and having a good time but when they saw me they all shut up.**

"**What The Hell Happened!" Emmet yelled. While everyone stared in shock.**

**I cried even harder while I put my head down, ashamed. All I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and die. But I couldn't because just than my dad  
****looked at everyone's face than picked me up bridal style and took me to the hospital. Time to tell everyone what happened.**


	3. Author Note Sorry

**Hello readers,  
****I'm very sorry I haven't been writing.  
********I have been very busy with school, dance, moving, ect.**

**So I'm working on the next chapter,  
****hopefully I'll have it on there by the weekend.**

**Umm…thank you for the people who reviewed  
****or have me on author alert/ story alert.**

**If you don't like my story than please tell me.  
****But please read and review**

**Also when I post my next chapter if you review  
****you can get a sneak peak of the next chapter.**

**So yeah Review and I'll write faster :]**

**Oh, and I have written a poem its called Broken  
****and the link is on my page. **


	4. Hospitals and Nightmares

**Hospitals and Nightmares **

**I wish I can go back in time, to where I was little and happy, to where my mom  
was still here by my side, or most recently what happened last night. **

**After Emmet, Rosalie, Alice, Jasper, Alexa, Johanna, Shannon, Kayla, Seth,  
****Brandon, Richard, and Jacob busted in the house and Em's outburst we went to the hospital.**

**I told the girls (Ali, Lexa, Jojo, Shan, K.k, and Sue) and my daddy what happened.  
****As I sat there and watched the girls cry and my daddy look like he wanted to cry  
and kill someone. I felt safe but like a burden and ashamed.**

**They slowly left one by one. I gave them permission to tell the boys,  
but not Em. I wanted to tell him.**

**I still haven't told Em what happened. I look over to his massive form sitting in a  
small chair and smiled softly. He looks so innocent and young, but I know he is  
hurting more than everyone else. No matter what I tell him, he still feels responsible.**

"**Hey, pumpkin," I hear my daddy say. I guess I was so lost in thought that I  
didn't hear him come in. "He feels like it's his fault, you know."**

"**I know. I wish he didn't," I tell him. "Daddy, I want to tell him, but I'm scared. I  
am so afraid that he won't look at me the same. I don't want him to judge me, or  
worst hate me." I start to cry.**

"**Oh, pumpkin, Em can never hate you. He hates that monster that did this to you,  
not you, never you," he says as he comes over and hugs me tight.**

"**Yeah, I can never hate you. You're my little sister, I adore you silly."  
Emmet says startling me.**

**I let out a little yelp as dad and him laugh at me. That, what he said to me  
means so much to me. I think I startled Em and dad as I start to sob.**

"**What's wrong?" Em and Dad say together.**

"**Nothing is wrong. I feel better knowing that you don't hate me or that you all  
won't judge me." I say sniffling. "Daddy may I speak to Em alone, please."**

"**Sure thing, pumpkin. I'll be in the waiting room with Sue. When ever you're ready  
****Dr. Brandon said you may go home.," my daddy says.**

**I told Emmet my story. He cried with me and once he got so mad I had to stop so he  
could calm down. In the end, he sat there and hugged me in until I couldn't breath.**

"**Izzy-B I'm so sorry this is all my fault," he said remorsefully, but as I went to  
go tell him it was not his fault he got so mad. "Yes it is my fault, if I just would have  
pulled away from Rose, you would not be in this hospital! I'm so sorry Izzy-B!" he  
started out yelling but ended up crying. I just sat there and held him as he cried.**

**I sat in my bed that night thinking about what has happened in my life.  
Than I remembered the box, my mom gave me with the notes from "The Talk" "That Time Of  
****The Month" "My First Boyfriend" "My First Date" "My First Kiss". If only I had a note  
for "Rape 101" ok so I know that's mean, but hey, I'm miserable right now.**

**I wish my mommy were here to help me. Grabbing my ipod, I put on The Hit by  
****Punchline and grab my book The Truth About Forever by Sarah Dessen. Hopefully to  
take my mind off everything. I ended up falling asleep.**

"**Wake up Bella!" a scared voice says franticly. I hear screaming, I wonder what's going on.  
Oh, it was me screaming. I start sobbing once again.**

"**Everything's ok Izzy-B," Emmet says as he rocks me back and forth. I look at the  
****time it says 5:45.**

"**Emmett you can go back to sleep, I'm fine." I try to reassure him. He just shakes  
his head and holds me tighter as to signal he wants to know what happened. He used  
to do this right after mom died. "You want to know what happened in my nightmare  
don't you," I question he nods his head.**

**I tell him how it felt so real. It was as if I was in that ally again being raped over  
again. I tell him that the man doesn't stop and finally he does but than he kills me. I  
start crying again so does Emmet. I wish I could make his pain go away. Tell him  
everything is going to be ok. But, I cant do that because I'm not sure about anything  
anymore. We just sit there and cry about everything and anything.**

**It feels so weird to sit here with my brother and cry. The last time I saw him cry  
was at our momma's funeral. I hate that this happened to me. I wish I didn't have to  
relive it in my dreams again.**

"**Bella, Emmet I want you all to come to the police station with me. So you can  
describe him and tell them what happened." my daddy says as he popped his head in  
****my room. Em and I just nod. Em leaves so he can go get dressed, as I start to undress  
I look down at my body and feel disgusted by the bruises and cuts but most of all  
the dirtiness of that mans body on mine.**

"**Bella come on, were leaving!" Em bellows.**

"**I'm coming right now!" I yell back.**

**The whole way to the police station, I feel sick. I'm about to go tell this story to  
the police and there going home and telling there kids that I happen to go to school with.**

"**So Bella, what happened?" Larry asked. I'm happy its Larry and not some other  
cop. My dad and mom went to school with him. I've know him since well forever. He  
is like a second dad to me. So I tell him everything. He tells me I can take a break and  
I can do the sketch later or bring it in later because, he knows I can draw better  
than anyone of them.**

**When I get home, Em makes pancakes. I eat as if I haven't eaten in weeks. More than  
****Emmet and that saying something.**

**I tell him I'm going to take a shower and going to take a nap. He tells me he is  
going to watch the game and see if the gang wants to come over later. I nod in agreement.**

**I walk to the bathroom to take a shower. My shower ended up taking a hour and a  
half because I sat there and scrubbed my body over and over again in till my skin was  
red and irritated. I start to cry, begging to know why god would let this happen to me.**

**When I get out the shower, I put on old baggy sweatpants and a big holey shirt  
with Emmet's name on the back. I turn on my ipod to Secondhand Serenade and my  
favorite song by them comes on its called Awake. I lay there falling asleep. I think of  
everything that has happened to me in my whole life. I have had some wonderful  
times and some horrible times.**

**Every time something bad happens it is usually a broken something or a bad  
grade. There have been two things in my life that no one should go through  
and that's losing your mom and getting raped.**

**As I think of this I grow more tired into I can't make out what they are saying on  
my ipod. I start to close my eyes wishing things never happened and thinking what is  
going to happen next. If only I knew what was really going to happen.**

**

* * *

**

Hello, People of Fan fiction. Review and tell me what you think.  
So, I'm making a deal with you all. If you review than you get a sneak peak of the next chapter.  
Also people who don't like my story you can put it down all you want, because I really don't care  
what you think. I am writing the next chapter and I'll put it up as soon as possible.

Please Review  
-Sydney Janelle


	5. Please READ :

THIS IS NOT A CHAPTER! THIS IS AN AUTHOR NOTE! BTW I HATE THEM SO SORRY!

OK, so my computer like died on me. So, I could not have updated. I am so sorry. I don't know how long it will take till it is fixed and for that I'm very sorry. Please stay with me here. As soon as I get my computer working I will be updating. Again I am very sorry. Also thank you for my wonderful reviews.

Love Sydney :]


	6. Author Note!

Hi, I know I haven't updated in along time. Personal things happened && I didn't have time. Rereading my story I found out that I did not like how it was going and feel it can be better. I might re-right it but I'm not too sure yet. Thank you too everyone who liked my story && supported it but I have seen my mistakes and think what was I doing? A new story is getting worked on and I'm thinking about making it a teenage love story but eh you never know. Thanks again.

Happy New Years,

Sydd


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